When did I stop having goals?

I dont really know what my goals are anymore. I dont know if I still have them or if I have just given up knowing that they wont happen. I know that sounds really defeatist but that is what I have become. I just dont know when. The thing is that deep down somewhere a bit lost and a bit forgotten, I truly believe you can acheive anything you want to. Money shouldnt stop you. A under priviliged childhood shouldnt stop you etc. If you want to acheive something, work your ass off and I bet you can do it. So why have I stop trying. I wanted to sort out my allotment. I havent done it. I wanted to make this into a beautiful house for me and the kids. I havent done that. Ok so we have only been in here a month but I have now given up wanting too. We have had problems with the landlord, so know I have given up wanting to be here and wanting to do anything with it. It was my dream to have a house with a garden and now I have it, its all wrong. I feel silly. I feel I should just make the most of having what I most wanted for the dogs and kids but I cant snap out of it. It dosent help that the little beggers keep getting through the fence so im in a constant battle. Im on edge every second letting them out then having to keep watch, then because I am watching the dogs for escaping the kids are drawring a piccasso on my walls or something equally as bewildering. I just think goodness me will you all just stand still for a second. So what on earth are my dreams and goals and how do I get back to aining for them again. I start loads of things with the best intentions and get nowhere. It is so fustrating.